What really matters....

I'm tired. Like, really tired. I have filled my life with so much stuff but I think I left out any room to breathe. I find myself day dreaming of extra hours in the day or an extra day added onto my weekend. I'm sure you can relate. I cannot remember the last time I actually had an evening, afternoon, or morning to do whatever I wanted. If I do find myself with a rare block of time, I fill it up with my own "honey-do's". Clean, laundry, yard work, that project I've been putting off....you name it. I don't think I even know how to relax anymore. I am literally a ball of stress and that stress is weighing me down.

Cut something out of your schedule, you say? Hmmm. I thought about that. However, that would mean the slowing down of important relationships I've been building, less worship time, less time with my niece and family, less time helping others, less girl time. I DON'T want to cut any of those out.

I found myself whining today. I was feeling sorry for myself because I have too much on my plate and not enough time to do it all.  My to-do list is mounting in my head and I don't see a time in the near future that I can even start on some of this stuff. I had a phone conversation where I was actually complaining about my life and how busy it is.  Then, God put things into perspective like he always does.....

After I got off the phone, I decided to watch a 9-11 Ten Years Later documentary my brother had on his DVR. It was about the NYFD and video from a documentary crew who happened to be in Tower I with the firemen when Tower II collapsed. It was a heart wrenching story. You cannot help but be moved and effected by their story.

How does this relate to me? In every way. On the way home last night, I started thinking about what those men must have felt when the Tower's started going down. I'm sure they did not think of the petty little stresses of everyday life. I think they were probably focusing on what truely matters.  They were looking death in the face and I have a feeling they KNEW what was important in life. If I were in their shoes, what would I be worried about? The laundry? The unvacuumed floor? The shows on my DVR that I haven't had time to watch? The window sills that need repair? No. I wouldn't be thinking of any of those things. I would be thinking about the people I love. I would wonder if I had told them I love them enough.  If they knew how much they meant to me and they impact each of them have had on my life. I would wonder what my legacy would be, what people would remember about me. I would wonder if I had done enough to help others, if I had made a difference to someone. 

At the end of the day only 3 things REALLY matter to me. God, relationships, and serving others. I'm glad I had some time to reflect on my life and really see it for what it is. God took the hazy glasses off my eyes to allow me to see clearly for the first time in a long time.  My life is full of those things that really really matter to me. It's those things that keep me so busy. I'm realizing now that those things are nothing to stress over, they are to be cherished. I don't think I knew how blessed I was until now. I am so thankful for the gentle way that God shows me what is true and what is real. I have a full life. My question to you is: What matters to you and are you filling your life with those things?