Power trip.....

We, as people, have been given an extraordinary power that most people don't even know they possess.  We all have the power to affect others in profound ways using only words.  How we choose to use or abuse this power, well....that's what I want to talk about.

Have you ever said something mean and hurtful to someone, knowing full well that your words would sting?  I have, many times.  We all know the buttons to push, the sensitive topics, the painful places deep within.  Some people choose to expose and exasperate those weaknesses for their own negative purposes.  Whether that's to control someone or to make them hurt like you hurt, either way....it's wrong.  Words do hurt.  They are powerful things.  They can sink in and stay there for a lifetime.  They can control you.  They can take the beautiful and make them feel ugly.  The can take the confident and make them feel inadequate.  They can and do change people.  Some words can be so damaging that years and years down the road they still affect you, almost control you.  That's powerful stuff.

We also have the ability to use this power for good.  Have you ever had a bad day and you're feeling down only to have someone be kind to you and all is well?  A smile goes a long way.  It transcends generations and languages.  It has the ability to comfort and encourage.  It's also contagious.  When we find the weakness in others, we should use our power to help them overcome their challenges, not bring them down.

We have the power to actually change people.  Let me say that again, we can change people.  I know there are people I've come across who have changed me, both for the good and for the not so good.  Words have come my way that have raised me to new levels and words that have left me in dark places and deep holes.  I choose to raise people up, to smile at a stranger, to encourage a child.  I will not use my power for anything negative or selfish.  I will choose my words wisely.  I've seen the damaging effects first hand and I don't want to negatively impact anyone.  So, the next time you speak, thing about what you are saying.  How you are changing someone.  I hope it’s a positive change.

Knight in shining armor....

They don't make them like they used to.  The knight in shining armor is a thing of the past.  The man who is honest, respectful, caring, brave, gentle, loving, chivalrous, devoted, and faithful is a rare find these days.  My great uncle Leamon was one of these men. 

Uncle Leamon was born in 1922 in rural Kentucky where he lived and worked on a farm until he entered the Army and was sent to Europe in WWII.  He served honorably, receiving multiple promotions to the rank of First Sargent and ultimately receiving the Purple Heart.  He returned to Kentucky where he spent his days working the farm and loving his wife.  He was a quiet man, but when he spoke-you listened.  He was a faithful man too.  God was first in his life. 

The world has lost a great man.  In my opinion, one of the last of a fading breed.  Uncle Leamon has taught me many things.  How to properly approach a bull.  How to walk through the pasture without stepping in cow pies.  The reason to hold on when riding a horse (thanks to the tractor driven by my brother scaring the horse that I was on).  How to live a life that God would be pleased with.  How to love someone with all of your heart and soul for a lifetime......just to name a few.

You will be missed Uncle Leamon.  In closing at his funeral, the pastor said something like this: We know that Leamon got a warm welcome when he met Jesus.  I imagine that he heard "Well done, my faithful servant, well done."  I can only hope to hear those same words one day.

Leamon Smith

Oct. 11, 1922 - May 20, 2011

Sunshine on my shoulders.....



at·ti·tude – noun (dictionary.com)

1. Manner, disposition, feeling, positiong, etc., with regard to a person or thing; tendency or orientation, especially of the mind.

2. Position or posture of the body appropriate to or expressive of an action, emotion, ect.

Attitude is a subject that seems to be popping up a lot lately.  The amazing John Maxwell got to me with his attitude talk at 12Stone a few weeks ago.

'God decides what happens to you, you decide how you react to it'. ~John Maxwell

How true that statement is.  His message really hit home with me and I started a little experiment at work the next week.  The goal was to see how my positive attitude would affect others.  What I learned is that it was contagious and that I was the one who benefited the most from it.  I was happier, less stressed out, I smiled more, and I was more patient.

Having a good attitude is a lesson that was hard for me to learn and one that I am still learning, and that I'm happy to learn.  Many of you know that I sometimes struggle with my health and right now, it is a struggle.  However, if I get upset or depressed or pull out the 'why me' card, what does that accomplish?  How does that help the situation?  It doesn't, it only makes it worse.

In small group last night, we were talking about how God places us in situations that are sometimes difficult or painful to prepare us for something more, or to teach us something that we will use in the future.  In 2000, my father was diagnosed with stage 4 oral cancer and was given a 5% chance to live.  I literally thought my father was going to die, that he would never walk the down the aisle at my wedding, and that he would never hold my children.  It was a hard pill to swallow.  I watched my dad get depressed, but I also watched him remain faithful to the Lord, relying on his Father for strength and comfort.  Throughout it all, his attitude was good, he didn't stress out about the future because it wasn't his to stress out about.  I didn't know it then, but that was a lesson I would need to learn myself.  My father beat the odds and is still with us, praise God.

When I was faced with my own health issues, I was mad; I'm not going to lie.  I didn't understand why I had to deal with this disease or even HOW I was going to deal with it.  Slowly but surely God changed my heart and that lesson I learned watching my father nearly a decade earlier came flooding back.  I CAN do this because I have Him holding my hand and walking with me every step of the way.  My attitude has played a huge role in how I deal with my issues.  That's not to say that I don't have bad days and 'poor pitiful me' days, because I do.  However, I try to keep those to a minimum.  I try not to stress out about all the things that I have no control over, because all that does is hurt me.  Let's face it, there are very few things in life that we do have control over, one of those is your attitude.  So, if a good attitude makes even the worst situations a little brighter, why not go with it?!  After all, having a bad attitude just brings you down.  There's enough in this world working to bring us down, we shouldn't contribute to it.  So, how's your attitude today?

Ode to mom...

Mom: Darn it!

Jenny: What?

Mom: I should have had the people in Lisbon write Emma’s name in Portuguese.  Remember when Uncle David did that for you and Matt when he was in China?  That was such a great gift, now I wish I had done that for Emma.

Jenny: You do realize that the Portuguese share our same alphabet letters, right?  Therefore, her name in Portuguese is spelled, E-M-M-A.  It looks no different than how we would write it.

Mom: Really?

Jenny: (laughing now) Ummm, yes mom.  Really.  In China they use characters; in Portugal they use the alphabet.

Mom: (laughing now too) Oh. Ok, never mind.  Forget I ever said anything.  

*Ps.  I don’t forget

Mom: Hello!  How are you?

Italian cabbie: I good.

Mom: This is such a lovely place, were you born here?

Italian cabbie: Hotel King, yes.

Mom: No, were you born here?

Italian cabbie: Shopping area there.

Mom: Have you lived here your entire life? (Nearly yelling now, as if this would make him understand)

Jenny: Mom, I don’t think he speaks English, you should stop talking to him.

Mom: Yeah, I guess so.

Italian server: Here is your food.

Mom: Grazie (pronounced: GHRAT-seee)

Jenny: Mom, its grazie (pronounced GHRAT-zee-A), not with a ‘see’ on the end of it.  It’s more of an ‘a’ or ‘eh’.

Mom: No, it’s not. 

Jenny: Yes mom, it is.  Listen closely, its quick, but its there.

Mom: No, it’s not.

Jenny: Yes it is!  (pulling out Italian phrasebook, then showing her the pronunciation) See, GRAHT-see-yeh.

Mom: Fine.

Mom: I need to think of something that Emma can call me besides Grandma.

Matt: Ok, well, what do you want her to call you?  

Summer: Grammy?

Jenny: Granny Lynn?

Matt: Nana Lynn?

Mom: What about sugar?

Matt/Summer/Jenny: WHAT?!?!?

Mom: Seriously.

*silence* *birds chirping* *pins dropping*

Matt/Summer/Jenny: (all rolling on the floor laughing)

Mom: Fine, I’ll just be Grammy.

Matt/Summer/Jenny: (still on the floor laughing)

Summer/Jenny: *singing* Ooohhhh Sugar…awww honey honey…..

*this continues to be a source of laughter between the family*

Happy Mother’s Day to my wonderful mother, Lynn Long.  We may not always see eye-to-eye or agree on much of anything at all, but I love you and you make me smile.  I enjoyed my time in Europe with you, even if we did get on each others nerves from time to time.  Memories made there cannot be shared by anyone other than us and I will cherish them forever.  You are a special woman and I would not be the independent, strong-willed woman I am today without you.  I hope you weren’t offended by my poking fun at you, after all, that’s how our family says, “I love you.”

In the words of my mother: “Jennifer Anne!  You just cooked your goose!”

Curiosity: Not always a good quality

Picture this: Beautiful piazza in Florence, Italy.  People everywhere speaking all sorts of languages.  Stars shine down to the open air restaurants that line the piazza.  Somewhere nearby there is a man playing New York New York (weird, I know) on an accordion.  The smell of fresh prosciutto, basil, and tomatoes fill the air.  Are you there?  I was.

Now, after I ate every last bite of a calzone that was bigger than any calzone I'd ever seen in the states, I needed to pee.  So, I find my way into the tiny women's restroom only to find a type of toilet I'd never seen before.  Now, side note.  This is a common occurrence in Italy, or Europe for that matter.  There are toilets of all kinds, normal ones, lidless ones, a hole in the ground (yes, seriously, a hole in the ground), and some crazy self-sanitizing lid type toilet.  This was my first encounter with the latter design.  I see the lid stuck at a 50 degree angle and my curiosity is sparked.  What is this?  How does this work?  The instructions on how to use this amazing contraption are on the wall in front of me, but I don't read Italian. 

So, I go by what the pictures are doing.  I push the lid down. Step one.  Only, I didn't realized that the lid was going to pop right back up.  So, I let go after I had bent over the torture device to get a better look.  The lid pops up so fast that I didn't have time to react, I was lucky I didn't get hit in the face.  Then, out of nowhere, blue smelly liquid comes shooting out of the back of the toilet coating the lid.....and my face.  I, of course, scream.  Then I start laughing and I cannot stop.  I'm sure that whoever was in the tiny bathroom with me was so confused about what was so funny in the stall next door.  I walked back to my table, where the sweet smells of delicious Italian food had been overtaken by the smell of sanitizer for some reason, and relay the story to my mom.  She laughed too.  The moral of the story, whenever you investigate how a toilet works, DO NOT bend down to...wait, who am I kidding.  Don't investigate toilets in foreign countries.

How to be free.....

Romans 6: 3-4

3 Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized in his death? 4 We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.

This was the daily Bible verse that appeared on my phone this morning thanks to an app called DailyBible.  This verse, in my opinion, was God speaking to me.  You see, I’ve been struggling with a message I heard at Good Friday services last week.  I was lucky enough to be able to attend the Passion City Church services at the Verizon Wireless Amphitheater to hear some amazing worship music and the wise words of Louie Giglio.  At one point in the service Louie was going over the things that Jesus took off our shoulders when he was crucified.  Two of those things were not something I had thought about before, Guilt and Shame.  These are two things that I have a lot of.  It was like someone punched me in the stomach.  Jesus took all of my guilt and shame with him to the cross?!  So, why am I still holding on to those toxic emotions?

How dare I keep holding onto the shame and guilt of the events in my life when Jesus died so that I didn’t have to bear the weight of those emotions?  How selfish of me.  It’s not my pain to carry because He’s already carrying it.  He died so that I didn’t have to carry that burden for my whole life. Here’s the problem.  I don’t know how to let it go.  I know I need to let it go, give it to God, finally be free…..but how do I do that?  I don’t know how to get from A to B.  I’m really struggling with this right now and I’m at a loss of what to do.  

I brought it up in small group and in a one on one with a wise friend.  The general advice was to pray for God’s help.  So, that’s what I’m doing and doing it often.  We’re reading ‘Forgotten God’ by Francis Chan and the past weeks chapter was about what we fear when it comes to the Holy Spirit.  I fear not being able to hear the Holy Spirit or not being able to feel the pushes and pulls from Him.  So, when I read the DailyBible verse this morning, I heard Him.  He is speaking to me and I can hear Him.  Slowly but surely I’m stripping off the broken layers so that the true me that God personally made can shine through.  With Him, nothing is impossible.

What Italy taught me about friendship....

I had an epiphany while I was in Italy.  It came about in a strange way, but left an impression on me.  Let me set the scene….I was chatting online with a friend one afternoon. He was upset and down about something, so I tried to help.  I became frustrated because everything I was doing to try to help make him feel better wasn’t working.  I didn’t know what to do, but I could feel his pain and I wanted nothing more than to take it away.  See, I have a bad habit.  I always try to fix things, even when they’re not mine to fix.  I want to make it all roses and lollypops. 

While I was chatting with him, I happened to be going through some pictures from my trip.  I came across one of some beautiful stone pillars-and it hit me.  A friend and a pillar are one in the same.  Let me explain.  A pillar is a symbol of strength.  It holds an enormous amount of weight all while making it look effortless.  Sometimes people use the pillars to lean against when they need a rest, sometimes they just step back and admire them, and sometimes they expect the pillars to hold the weight of an entire building without faltering.  Just like friendship.

I think that I could and should take a lesson on friendship from a pillar.  Take my friend for an example.  At that moment, he didn’t need me to carry all the weight of his problem, he didn’t need me to fix it or make it better, he didn’t even really need me to lean on, he just needed me to be there standing strong assuring him that he isn’t alone.  So, that’s what I did.  I stopped trying to fix the problem, I stopped trying to cheer him up, I was just me…I listened and told him he was in my prayers, because honestly, that is the only thing I could really do for him.  

I learned that, as a friend, I may be called to carry the load for a struggling friend, I may be asked to be a shoulder to cry on, and I may be asked to simply just be there.   I will strive to be a good pillar in the lives of my friends.